Life of a Creative Writing Grad Student [and knitter]

The occasional opining of a sleep-deprived grad student, with cheese.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Oh boy, oh boy

Lett me just tel u abowt speling thingz corecttly. Itz vary importent u no, two spel thingz wrighte. Without the normul speling, peeple wont no wut yer saing.

Four instince, on TOPIK, theirs a link on speling, that gos lik this:

http://ttopic.english.ttu.edu/writingelements/elementread.asp?keyword=spelling

Tri it sum thyme. It goz lick this:

Spelling Errors
In this age of spell checks, no document should contain spelling errors. Basically a spelling error in a document shows not so much an inability to spell but a laziness in not applying the proper comptuter tool. Laziness, of course, does not send the right signal to the evaluator.


And thee kwestchon iz, kan u uze the wright comptuter toolz?

And.

Saturday, October 22, 2005

Help! There's been a theft at the hospital!

While en route to the office this afternoon, E and I encountered a strange scene, a scene that had us rubber-necking for several yards more than was strictly necessary. There by the hospital, and almost onto the street, the scene unfolded thusly:

Three police cars in a row, with lights flashing, prevented a man in a hospital gown and carrying the fluid pole (or whatever you call them) on wheels from leaving. The man in question was tall, with fly-away white hair in small quantity, and wearing a paper gown that had outgrown his bony frame. Poor man. He looked very confused. The policemen in question were all clumped around the man and looked like they were trying to calm him down. One of the cop cars had a bike loaded onto the back.

It was odd. I suppose they could have been arresting the man for stealing a fluid pole on wheels, or for showing his butt crack to everyone in the area. But I really hope he was just lost, a bit out of it, and on his way to Sonic to get some tater tots, while the policemen were helping him back to his hospital room with the generous lie of there being a lot of tater tots waiting on his pillow for him. Though that second senario raises the question of how the man got that far out of the hospital with a fluid pole on wheels, it is still a nicer scenario than an arrest scene. I mean, the guy was dragging along a towering rod of metal with precious dripping fluid of some kind. He was harmless except for the whole butt crack thing and the possible injury to any cars that hit him. But even then, he's a far cry from a deer. I doubt any motorist would notice hitting him except the pole coming straight through the windshield.

On to happier notes, however, that do not involve little old men with fluid poles on wheels being detained by 6 police officers (he sure looked overpowering to me, better call for more backup):

The class Halloween party was a success. Three jumbo bags of candy are gone, as well as two boxes of cookies. The good news: I didn't eat all that much of it. The kids got all the good stuff during class, and there wasn't much chocolate left at the end. I do admit though, that our office and the surrounding neighborhood is a black hole for sweets of all kinds. The sweets come in; they don't come out.

They students took to groupwork fairly well, but like J's class, I think they're a bit group worked out. Next time, I'll have them solve the Gargomel problem on their own, and then their TOPIC post will be a follow up on that in class assignment.

I think I really shocked the students when I showed up with a ginormous bowl of candy, cookies, and a black witch's hat. Oh, and pumpkins. I had a special request for pumpkins. All four officemates helped me carry it down, and it took every one of us. When we got it in the room, I put on the hat, and wore it for the whole class. Students who have never paid an ounce of attention were staring at me for 80 minutes solid. I make no guess at how much they listened, per say, but they did watch.

Midterm grades are in for them all now, and there are several who need some serious help. I've had to advise some students to drop the class while they still can. It was really sad, but when the grades are that low, there isn't anything in the realm of possibility that can save them.

Oh well. Some good news to balance it out. Writing from a character's shoulder is 139% easier than writing from the general floating-in-the-middle-of-things position. I see success in the future for the novel. Everybody do a cheer!

End.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Hmm

You know, I opened this up because there was something I was going to post. But I forgot what it was. So I guess it didn't matter much. Goodnight!

End.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Oh, the drama of it all

I finally admitted to myself that my thesis was crumbling around me. I had all the dialogue, all the emotions, the stage directions, the whole eight yards. That ninth yard, voice, however, was missing. It was missing with a vengeance. My entire world is foreign, and all the characters are at home in it. There's no novice character to whom things will be explained (thus explaining it to the reader as well). There was no hope of adequately writing this society without a Leo Tolstoy voice (he's allowed to have great narrative paragraphs sprinkled liberally through his writing). So I had a long, long, long talk with my advisor. He listened to the problem, and we, together, came up with an effective solution. I need to take the Modernist approach, and follow a single character around, allowing for this character to have internal monologues about the society. Perhaps add an element of rebellion to the mix so there'd be someone out there complaining about society. What I'm about to say may shock some of you. It shocked me. Please don't faint, or call me this evening with "What the Hell did you do!?!?!" I won't have a satisfactory answer for you. I won't even be home until late. There's a meeting tonight. But back to the dreadful decision.

We have decided it would be best to start over. Entirely.

I've kept the prologue and all my notebooks are still intact. The rest is gone. Entirely gone. It's kind of sad, but the fresh start is exciting, and I really think it will be easier to work with this way.

Well, I'm off to eat my dinner. The meeting is soon, and then I lesson plan.

Gargomel has fallen, and he can't get up. How can the Smurfs help him without getting eaten by the cat Azriel?

End.

Sunday, October 16, 2005

Vegetable Carving

Last night (and into this morning) E and I engaged in some old-age, ritualistic pumpkin carving. It was E's first time without the tried and true jack o'lantern style, and my first time with... I'm not sure what you call it. Both pumpkins were smashing successes. There will pictures at the end of this, for you good boys and girls who keep reading, and for you clever boys and girls who simply scroll down.


The ceremony began with the bathing of sacrificial vegetables, the preparing of the surgical instruments, and the choosing of the new appearence. E chose to give her pumpkin a lovely witch-and-grinning-pumpkin motif, and I chose the little mermaid, because nothing says "fish" like "pumpkin". E finished way before I did. She had time to mix up a batch of pumpkin bread, bake it, and let it cool between her finishing time and mine. Then there was a giant photo op.


E spent a long time commenting on the plastic surgery I was giving Ariel, and we bemoaned a few slip-ups here and there. By and large, a fun time was had by all. And those weird Islanders (AM and K) wanted to just eat the "squash" without having fun. Some day, we'll get it through to them that it's fun to waste food for recreation.


Here's E's pumpkin. I actually only have a few photos of this one on my camera, so there will only be two here:


With the lights off:
Image hosted by Photobucket.com


And with a really cool reddish glow and nicely positioned candlelit grin:
Image hosted by Photobucket.com


Then we have the merpumpkin, found below. I fully acknowledge the oddly glowing eyes and the slightly demonic cast those peepers take on at night. If you look and see the kind of space I'm working on, though, I think you'll understand my fear that, by working on her more, I'll destroy her.


Here's Ariel with the light on her:
Image hosted by Photobucket.com


Here she is with less light on her and more light in her:
Image hosted by Photobucket.com


And here she is with still less light in the room:
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Vegetable Carving

Last night (and into this morning) E and I engaged in some old-age, ritualistic pumpkin carving. It was E's first time without the tried and true jack o'lantern style, and my first time with... I'm not sure what you call it. Both pumpkins were smashing successes. There will pictures at the end of this, for you good boys and girls who keep reading, and for you clever boys and girls who simply scroll down.

The ceremony began with the bathing of sacrificial vegetables, the preparing of the surgical instruments, and the choosing of the new appearence. E chose to give her pumpkin a lovely witch-and-grinning-pumpkin motif, and I chose the little mermaid, because nothing says "fish" like "pumpkin". E finished way before I did. She had time to mix up a batch of pumpkin bread, bake it, and let it cool between her finishing time and mine. Then there was a giant photo op.

Here's E's pumpkin. I actually only have a few photos of this one on my camera, so there will only be two here:

With the lights off:
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

And with a really cool reddish glow and nicely positioned candlelit grin:
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Here's Ariel with the light on her:
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Here she is with less light on her and more light in her:
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

And here she is with still less light in the room:
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Saturday, October 15, 2005

OMG

Any recipie that takes two sticks of butter...

To make 20 cookies...

Is BAD for you.

That's one stick of butter for 10 cookies. There's 8 Tablespoons of butter in a stick. That's almost a whole Tablespoon of butter per cookie. And you know no one will ever eat only one cookie a day. You might as well just eat the butter right out of the fridge, and save yourself the trouble of baking cookies.

But I bet they're tasty.

End.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Dang Public Schools!

I'm sitting here trying to come up with "public school"-friendly themes for my students to work on tomorrow, and I settled on Star Wars, III. Surely that'll do. But the main theme is Anakin's fall from grace. A Christian set of terms if there was one. This is only the latest in a long string of things I've had to catch myself before saying. Anakin's decsent into evil is how it's termed now. But fall from grace is *much* better. I just can't use it. Because, if you'll observe my title, of the dang public schools. Grrr. And that's the post for today.

End. (or rather, Amen.)

Monday, October 10, 2005

Guess Who's Leaving School?

That would be me. I've just called [e-mailed, really] in a potential sick day, since I don't want to see the building again within the next 5 hours. I was there most of today, and all day Saturday (overtime is sweet), and I need some time away from the corridors. I'll still try to be there at 8, but I know full well that my body is finally protesting this treatment. I need the sleep too badly, and my alarms won't work 4 hours from now. They'll go off, but my body will ignore them, and I'll open my eyes when I detect subconsciously that it's way too light out. Then I'll panic, run around, and have a shitty day. No matter my state of awareness later today, I won't be worth much at work and it'll be a miracle if I remain awake for my "butchery of comedy" class.

So the alarms are set, and I'll try. Hard. Really hard. But I don't expect much, and probably won't deliver. I'm a bit upset that this kind of night is happening so early in my semester, but there's nothing I can do about it now but get some sleep. I'll be more productive later, and must give up for the evening.

Good morning, all!

End.

Saturday, October 08, 2005

Another Note

I understand that on the weekends it costs too much to heat this building. Almost no one is here most weekends. But this weekend there's a conference in town, on this campus, in this building. You'd think they'd heat it up for the conference. No. It's a balmy 65 degrees in here. Thank you MB for the fingertipless gloves. They are a lifesaver.

And before you ask, yes, I do spend many weekends up here in the office. This is just the first cold weekend. I'm entitled to a little gripe here and there. Also, I'm getting overtime for being here, since I'm on call for the conference technology stuff. Very nice.

End.

Book Sale

I went to heaven yesterday, but had to return after only 2 hours. After joining "Friends of the Library," I had free reign in the basement of the public library to ... buy their books! The entire basement, with all the shelves fully stocked, arranged by type, by author, by quality... Each book only 50 cents. The entire place had an old, musty book smell, and I could have spent all day there. As it was, I bought a full shopping cart worth of books, and E and I had to make several trips between us to deliver them all to the car and to our respective apartments. In two hours, I managed to purchase more books than I have ever bought at once before in my life.

E said it best: "I can go to Hastings and spend two hours, and come back with 2 books for 30 dollars. Here, I came back with 30 books for 2 dollars."

And yes, even though each book was 50 cents, they had special grab bags that help the book total climb while the cost sinks. Imagine this: A brown paper sack, stacked with as many books as will fit, and then a few on top, all stapled up so the contents are a mystery. One dollar. Easily 15 books. One dollar. You can't buy Ramen noodles that cheap.

I made out with two bags I personally filled, a fiction bag, 2 thriller bags, a mystery bag, and 2 crafts and hobbies bags. And a box of "better books" that cost 2 dollars a piece for being in really good condition. I am the proud owner of the entire Hitchhiker's Guide set, in one book, for 2 bucks. And a whole lot of Mary Higgins Clark books that I'm sure sr would be happy to read. I also got an encyclopedia of food, and three cookbooks. And several maps that I can use for cartography references when putting the finishing touches on my own map. And all the Hannibal books so I can highlight them for my paper on Harris's use of present tense. And. And. And.

A shopping cart full of books and, unfortunately, no time to read them. But they're there, and this means I can put little blue stickers on them and line them up in order of most interesting for later. Yee-haw.

And that was my trip to heaven. In February, heaven opens its doors again for the half-price book sale. They're already 50 cents. Do you realize how many shopping carts I can fill if they're only 25 cents?

On this giddy note, I resign myself to writing a crappy Drama paper and listening to more Dvorak. I hope your Friday mornings were as fun as mine was.

Oh yeah. I forgot one of tbe best parts. I saw three different folks from the department there, all loaded down with books and making second trips to buy more. We must be some of their best customers. I mean, that makes five of us in the first two hours. The book sale lasts all weekend. Yikes.

End.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Ah, lesson planning

Last time, I played some music for the class and had them pretend they were fish. It was a sort of persuasive assignment, with the students pleading for their lives with a hungry bird.

This time, we're discussing audience, purpose, sentence structure, word choice and voice in ... the music of Wierd Al Yankovic. Yes, folks, I'm playing comedy music for them tomorrow. We'll be discussing lots of stuff that they can then apply to written text. I hope it doesn't bomb.

And I'm off to plan.

End.

Sunday, October 02, 2005

Danger: scary linguistic shift taking place

The following is a tidbit of a conversation I had last night that scared me.

Me: Yes, but scholarly abstention is hardly an admirable solution, is it?
[roughly three sentences go by as Em, my conversational partner, attempts not to grin – it’s a struggle]
Me: Shit. I just said abstention, didn’t I?
Em: Yep.
Me: I didn’t even know I knew that word!

Augh! I’m turning into someone who uses big words without realizing it. While teaching on Thursday, I used the word “microcosm” and didn’t register it until the fifth blank stare. Then I had to back track and explain the example. This must stop. I want my old vocabulary back! The one normal people use.