Moses

So why did the chicken cross the road?

For the farmer said unto the chicken, “Thou shalt cross the road, for I will bring thee up out of the side of the road wherein you dwell; and in that day if you do not cross the road quickly, and avoideth the evil of the passing cars that inhabit the road, ye shall surely die.

McCulley, Darrell A. "Historical-Critical Method Should Apply to Classics, Too." Spectrum 26 September 1997: 3.